There were a lot of things to love in this episode! No humanity Stefan. No humanity Caroline exercising perfect control. Steroline finally hooking up! Enzo and Alaric’s Vampire Hunter Agency. Bonnie’s revenge. And crazy mother Salvatore, just to name a few!

Let’s do a quick recap!

We open the episode with Caroline cleaning up the mess that she and Stefan made at the bar. When Enzo comes in he wonders why someone with no humanity should even care about whether or not the bar is clean. Caroline lets him know that she wants things to still be the same when she flips her switch back on. She doesn’t want to get kicked out of school and ruin her life. Plus, she is auditioning for the school musical tomorrow. She has a routine and she needs to stick to it.

At first I was a little upset. One of my main complaints has always been that the writers have commitment issues with their plot lines. Caroline was so badass last episode and now she has perfect control over her no humanity life and is aware of what she’s doing. I thought about it and now can argue that maybe it’s a choice how you live when your humanity is off. Maybe Caroline just chooses to do it differently and not as hastily as the others have. Anyway, by the end of the episode it seems they get the story back on track for her.

While Caroline continues cleaning up, Damon is patiently waiting for his brother to come home. When Stefan walks in he asks where they keep the weapons. It’s funny because A) Stefan not even knowing where they keep weapons further proves the juxtaposition of his two personas and B) the Salvatore’s keep their weapons in the throne. Of course they have a throne.

Damon is a little annoyed that Stefan has chosen today to turn off his humanity since there is so much other drama going on. However, neither of the brothers know about eachother’s said drama. Stefan turned his humanity off to save Sara Salvatore’s life ( a girl who Damon doesn’t even know is alive). And Damon is busy trying to get back into the 1903 prison world to see his mother (who Stefan doesn’t know is alive).

Damon does attempt to inject Stefan with vervaine but fails and is forced to beat up a couch on account of his rage once Stefan leaves. Definitely an improvement from going out for snacks at the local college party.

Elena comes over to deliver some more news to Damon. Stefan was Caroline’s emotional trigger and since his humanity is off as well they are slim on options for preventing Stefan from reaching ripper status.

Damon pauses this conversation and fills Elena in on his mama drama and the fact that she is still alive and a ripper. The apple clearly doesn’t fall far from the tree since Stefan inherited that lovely quality from her. Elena realizes that their mother could be the answer to the humanity issue. If they could get Mama Salvatore out of her prison world long enough to get Stefan to flip his switch then he could get Caroline to flip hers back on.

The only snag in their plan is they need witches. Kai has the ascendant and they need the Bennett blood. Plus, in order to bring that many people to the prison and stay there for an extended amount of time they need the power of two witches. This is where Damon’s plan hits a little snag.

If you can recall, Bonnie is still (naturally) livid at Kai for literally stabbing her in the back and leaving her alone in the 90’s. However, Damon says that she will get the answer to all of her prayers once they get there. Kai is also going under the pretenses that Bonnie will be there as well. He still is under the cloak of Luke’s empathy and wants to apologize to her.

Once the four of them get to 1903, Kai and Bonnie go to look for the other ascendant while Damon and Elena go to the Salvatore mansion. Elena is having a grand old time looking around Damon’s childhood home. She even finds an adorable baby picture of him. Oh wait. That’s Stefan. The one next to it is Damon…oops! Classic Elena “torn between two brothers” Gilbert mistake.

Then Lily enters and we are treated to an awesome pilot episode call back of “hello, mother.” She meets Elena and begins to tell the two how she ended up there. Back in 1903 she was given vampire blood in the TB ward and shortly after began her murdering spree, which led her to being trapped in the prison world.

She has found and used up all of the blood in her prison except for one measly little jar. She takes two drops of blood a week in order to stay alive until the day that someone came back, and luckily for her it was her son.

Damon uses the moment to tell her about why it is he actually came. They need Lily to help turn Stefan’s humanity switch back on, which she would be more than happy to do. Only catch is her friends have to come too. Um what? That’s when I knew she was probably psychotic after having spent all of that time alone.

Turns out that Lily has a vampire “dolls” which she calls her family. They technically are all still alive but have given up their rations of blood for her so that she would learn how to control her ripper tendencies. By doing this she has saved enough blood to give them and bring them back to the real world with her. My first thought was who are these vampires and what kind of havoc are they going to cause when they all inevitably go back to present day.

Out in the woods Bonnie has led Kai into a trap. They weren’t following a locator spell, she was leading him out to the middle of nowhere so that she could have her revenge. She stabs him in the back and when she goes for the heart shot he vanishes into thin air. I guess her and Damon didn’t really think about the fact that he is the most powerful witch in his coven. Bonnie has no other choice but to leave and therefore Kai will most likely be locked in the 1903 prison world, where the clothes are not as comfortable as a flannel and ripped jeans.

As time is dwindling for Bonnie to keep the spell open, Damon smashes the jar of blood and tells Lily that they have to leave. He doesn’t consider these vampires his family. Damon is her family. Stefan is her family. And more importantly Stefan is his family and that’s Damon’s number one priority. He promises Lily that they will come back for her family. We can all assume that’s a lie.

Kai get back to the group a second too late and is trapped in 1903. I was actually really sad about this. I have really learned to like Kai and the typical CW lover in me kind of wants him to work things out with Bonnie because they really do have chemistry and I think a lot of potential for stories in the future. He ends up down in the basement with Lily’s “family” and it looks like he gets a little too close as one of them leeches on to him.

Back at the Salvatore mansion, Lily is set up in Stefan’s room acclimating to life in 2015. Damon is downstairs making out with Elena when Bonnie comes in. Elena excuses herself and gives the duo a moment. Here, Bonnie gives Damon the one thing that he’d wanted to get when they were trapped in 1994. Since none of the other stuff with Silas had happened yet the cure was still in Nova Scotia and Bonnie got it for him.

Damon isn’t so sure that he still wants it for Elena. That’s really none of Bonnie’s business but all that matters now is that the cure is back in play. Anyone have any bets who it’s going to? My bets are Kai, Stefan or Alaric and Jo’s baby!

Okay let’s get to what was up with Caroline and Stefan this week. As I said earlier, Caroline is actually insanely good with controlling her humanity-less self and this doesn’t sit too well with Stefan who has literally no control. His plan is to get her to cross over to his dangerous world of living with no ties to anything. In fact, he already murdered Caroline’s potential drama director right in the middle of her audition!

Caroline gets him back by daintily taking apart his motorcycle. Literally all she did was unscrew the bolts. He calls her out for being an embarrassment to all humanity-less vampires. Then she punches a hole in his gas tank and walks off.

Meanwhile, Alaric takes a break from vetoing baby names and gets recruited by Enzo to help capture Stefan and Caroline. Good thing too because Stefan and Caroline are causing havoc at Whitmore. Stefan wants Caroline to kill an innocent girl who happens to still be on campus for Spring Break. They end up getting into a huge fight and then try to bomb Enzo and Alaric when the two find them.

Stefan wants to kill them and thankfully Caroline also puts her foot down on that one. This pisses Stefan off and he returns back to the girl who showed up earlier. He wants Caroline to let go. Turn it off completely. Go over to the dark side. When she doesn’t budge he simply bites the girl and entices Caroline to feed on her with the open wound as a temptation.

She feeds on the girl and then completely let’s all of her inhibitions go. She kisses Stefan and they have sex in the dorm lobby. I would like to be super excited about this but I wasn’t overly thrilled. I’m not sure what the repercussions will be when they both turn their switches back on.

Enzo returns to Sarah Salvatore in the hospital and apologizes to her for all of the danger he put her through. And just when you think he’s actually being a good guy and letting her go to live a normal life, he uses her real last name, which of course will spike her interest and keep her around. You never know what his plan is.

Alaric returns home to Jo who tells him that he was stupid to run off with Enzo. She needs him to stay alive for at least 18 years and frankly so do I!