The Losers is based on the DC comic books by Andy Diggle and while I am sure that they are anything but in comic book form, the film version from director Sylvain White is definitely a Loser.

Here is the basic plot of the movie according to Wikipedia because frankly as soon as the movie was over, I forgot what the film was about and just wanted to go home and watch the rest of the Canucks game and watch Glee and Lost that I had recorded:

Five members of an elite United States Special Forces team (Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Columbus Short, Chris Evans, Óscar Jaenada and Idris Elba) are sent into the Bolivian jungle. The team find themselves the target of a betrayal instigated from inside by a powerful enemy known only as Max (Jason Patric). Believed to be dead, the group makes plans to even the score when they’re joined by the mysterious Aisha (Zoe Saldana), a beautiful operative with her own agenda.

Maybe I wasn’t paying attention because I had no idea the movie started as this was an advanced screening and they played a few trailers right before the start of the movie so I don’t understand what was the initial mission but I do understand what drives the rest of the movie as you see above.

What really bugged me was the storyline was pretty predictable, the dialogue as written by Peter Berg and James Vanderbilt was pretty bad. And I can’t help associate the some of the 5 games to their TV personas that they are famous for that I don’t even remember their character’s name. For example, Dean Morgan I know him as Denny from Grey’s Anatomy so I kept on calling him Denny in my head. Same goes for Elba who I know as Charles from The Office. Every time he came on screen I kept on thinking “Oh! there’s Charles and he’s rocking a John Locke from Lost type scar on his eye). There was another member of the team that I kept on calling Apolo Anton Ohno because that guy happened to look like him.

There was a lot of shooting too in this movie and this supposed Max (played way over the top by Patric) is apparently better protected than the U.S. President but then way were these guys dropping like Stormtroopers in Return of the Jedi and the slow-mo at the first shoot-out was completely unnecessary.

And this movie seems to be set-up to be a franchise like other comic book movies like Iron Man, Batman, Spider-Man.

The only good thing that I actually liked about this movie and I can’t believe I am typing this and that was Chris Evans, the beefcake from Fantastic Four. He actually brought a lot of comic relief to the film and I found his love and pride he shows for his niece throughout the film completely endearing.

Zoe Saldana must like picking projects that have that sequel potential, considering she will be back as Uhura in the next Star Trek movie that was based on JJ Abrams awesome re-boot and will appear in Avatar 2.

Alas, The Losers is a completely forgettable movie that doesn’t deserve a sequel.